How to Romance Yourself this Valentine’s Day (and Every Day)


January 31, 2023

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Since 2008, I’ve told womens’ stories through empowering boudoir sessions. Now as a certified life coach as well as a photographer, I help women cultivate radical self-love, guided by mindset. Sit back with a margarita  in hand and let's do this transformational journey together.
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Hi, I'm tami

The holiday of love (Valentine’s Day) is just around the corner and I’m sure you’ve bared witness to the plethora of heart-shaped items and ways to romance your [future] loved one. But you probably haven’t seen much in the media or on shelves about romancing yourself. And let’s be honest, if you aren’t showing yourself a little bit of self-love, how can you be open to accepting love from someone else? 

We, women, can be especially harsh to ourselves. Constantly bashing ourselves for doing something wrong, comparing ourselves to others, and never living up to the extreme expectations we set for ourselves. We choose self-loathing, shame, hate, + bitterness as the emotions we feel for ourselves among the many options available. How does this serve you? How does beating yourself up prove fruitful? It usually doesn’t. And I want to remind you…your feelings are a choice. So if you could choose any emotion, why not choose love?

I know, I know…it’s not that easy! Sometimes it’s hard to have those feelings of love toward yourself! But something that is important to note is that love is a feeling and your feelings are ALWAYS caused by your thoughts about your circumstances. So creating the emotion of self-love starts with being intentional with your thoughts about yourself. 


How to Romance Yourself this Valentine’s Day (and Every Day) by life coach Tami Keehn.

1. Pay Attention to how you Talk to Yourself. 

Positive self-talk is so very important! Start noticing how you talk to yourself. Listen to the mental chatter that lives up in your head that you aren’t always conscious of. Would you talk this way to your best friend? If the answer is no, then how would you talk to her? Whenever you catch yourself speaking harshly to yourself, take a moment to journal or coach yourself. How can you reframe what you tell yourself in a kinder + more compassionate tone?


2. Get to Know Yourself  

Take some time to really learn more about what makes you thrive.

– What do you love to do?
– What do you want to start doing?
– What do you want to stop doing?
– What do you dream about doing 5 years from now?

Get to know the “real” you. It can be so easy to get caught up on what everyone else is doing or what you think you “should” be doing, but taking a moment to really figure out what makes you happy can help you create more love for yourself + your life.

3. Feel Appreciation Toward Yourself

So often we focus on the next thing + how we can improve and get better, but what about taking some time to appreciate what you’ve already accomplished? Something that I’ve recently started practicing myself is journaling at the end of each day something that I can celebrate. Whether it be a personal accomplishment or just something that makes me smile, it always leaves me feeling grateful for my life + all that it’s given me so far.


4. Show up for Yourself (Even when it’s Difficult)

It can be easy to brush off your own priorities in order to help someone else – that seems like a valiant thing to do. But when you don’t keep your word to yourself, you may start to feel resentful towards yourself. When you block off time yourself to work towards a goal, stick with it. When you plan your meals in advance, honor that food plan. The more you go all-in on showing up for yourself, the better you will feel.


5. Schedule Self-Care Time First 

For many ladies, this may feel selfish and like you need to do all of your “to-do” tasks first before you can enjoy some leisure time but do you know what usually happens when you do this? You NEVER get around to your self-care time! Make your leisure time a non-negotiable!
– Schedule that spa day
– Go grab drinks with your girlfriends
– Get that dream vacation onto your calendar
– Enjoy a leisurely afternoon walk at the park



There is no better time than this season of love and this present moment when you are reading this blog post, to focus on loving yourself more. Love always wins. So enjoy a little self-romancing this season + in the future seasons of your life. The art of self-love is a lifelong process that takes practice, but with small changes, + little daily habits, you’ll find yourself becoming more and more in love with your life and yourself! The more you practice, the better you become at it. Happy Love Day!



Are you interested in learning how to practice self-love more? How you can romance yourself + love the life you live?

Sign up for a FREE phone consultation with me, your personal certified life coach, and we will chat more about how 1:1 coaching will help you finally love yourself more.



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