Self-Confidence is a feeling of trust in one’s abilities, qualities, and judgment. (According to the Googles. Lol)   

It is something that I think all of us are striving for at some point in our lives. It feels like it is what pushes us over the hurdles and through the obstacles to achieve our goals. You probably think if only I had the confidence in myself to do the scary things, I’d have accomplished so much more by now. So many of you feel like you are stuck in place without it. But why is it that so many of us feel that we lack the self-confidence we need to get to those wins that we so desire? And how do we get more of it? Read on below to see my top 9 mindset hacks to create more self-confidence in your life.

Hack #1 – Self Confidence comes from your thoughts, not your actions. 

So many of us think that if we just practice something enough or learn enough about something, we all of a sudden magically find confidence. But confidence comes from your mindset and you have to have it first before you can create the desired results that you want. You have to have the confidence to create the external evidence of it. If you don’t create the mindset + belief of confidence first, you just end up sitting there indulging in doubt + confusion and you won’t actually take the actionable steps you think you need to create the self-confidence you want. I know, it’s slightly trippy to think of it that way, but I promise this is the way it works!

Hack #2 – Stay in your lane. 

Confidence is an inside job. It is always going to come from that space of believing and trusting that you can do whatever it is you want to do, that even when you make a mistake, that you will show up as the next version of yourself. If you are constantly looking outside of yourself for external validation from others or the environment around you, you are always going to fall short.

Hack #3 – Focus on what you can control 

You can’t control what other people are going to think of you. Or what they are going to do. When you focus on “hoping” the world will like what you have to offer, you give all of your power away. The thing you can control though is your thoughts. Instead of thinking, “They won’t like me so I’m not even going to bother”, try thinking instead, “They may not react the way I want them to, but I’m going to go for it anyways.” You will never be able to control the people around you, but you can control your thoughts about them and that is so very powerful towards finding that inner confidence.

Hack #4 – Reflect on your accomplishments

So often we want to focus on what we need to improve on to get to our goals, that we forget to focus on what we’ve already accomplished. What are your accomplishments? And more specifically, what are the times that you overcame a huge obstacle? When you can see how often you’ve been faced with challenges + have come out ahead, it will help you to create that mindset of confidence.

Hack #5 – Have a Strong “Why”

What is your “Why” for doing something? Once you’ve asked yourself “why”,  ask yourself why again. A lot of times your reasons for going after your goals are a lot deeper than you thought. For example, if someone were to ask me why I wanted to be a photographer, I might say because “I love to take photos…it’s a passion of mine”. But then if they asked why is it a passion of mine, I would tell them that it’s because I want to help women exist in their photos and feel beautiful + confident in their own skin. That’s my strong why. That reason motivates me to be the best boudoir photographer I can be.

Hack #6 – Be afraid and do it anyway  

My mentor always says that when you do scary things, the worst that can happen is a feeling. Many of us will do absolutely anything to avoid feelings of fear or shame or embarrassment. But at the end of the day, the worst that could happen is feeling that feeling. You aren’t going to die. It’s just a vibration in your body. And the more you do the scary things, the less scary they become. You build up your fear resilience.

Hack #7 – Try to Feel Courageous vs Confident

Sometimes there are those moments where no matter how hard you try, the fear is just paralyzing. Trying to drum up the confidence seems damn near impossible. So instead of figuring out what thoughts will create confidence for you, what if you focused on being courageous instead? You know you aren’t going to feel confident doing something – the fear is still going to be there, but you can be proud of how courageous you were. Courage can eventually lead to the self confidence you desire.

Hack #8 – Stop beating yourself up

When you beat yourself up for not taking a risk, do you think that’s going to motivate you to try in the future? Nope! In fact, you are just creating more evidence for yourself as to why you suck. Ain’t nobody got time for that! So why not instead get curious. Become the observer of your thoughts. Ask yourself why you are afraid of doing something? Or question if you could figure out another way to do it? When you get curious you will learn + you will grow, and you will create the beliefs that will help you grow your self-confidence.

Hack #9 – Get rid of the fixed mindset.

It’s not always so black + white. You weren’t just born a confident person or a scared person. Confidence is an emotion that you have the ability to create over time. You aren’t “stuck” with the mindset that you are currently in. A fixed mindset tends to base things on our raw talent. If you are not good at something, you won’t ever be good at it. But a growth mindset will bread self-confidence because you know that you can figure things out, you know that you can grow. 

Are you ready to dig deeper into the mindset work that will help you create the confidence you desire to achieve your goals? 

I’d love to help you get over your fears with reaching your goals + help you create a self-confidence that sky-rockets you towards your dreams!

Let’s get you set up for a FREE consultation with me so you can learn more about how life coaching can help you with building your self-confidence.

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